Ya-Ya, boo-Ha, Yee-Haw or even Hee-Haw, whatever call you use to rally the troops or have one fall into place. Well there is nothing divine about this film. In fact if you thought you were getting some deep dark pledge or secret to be revealed, well you are half right. This dysfunctional chick flick is not so much to do about a secret sisterhood than the revelation of child abuse, alcoholism, insanity, depression and abandonment. The Divine Secrets of the Sisterhood stars Sandra Bullock (Murder by Numbers) as playwright Siddalee Walker who is just as crazy as her truly insane mother Vivian Jane Abbott “Vivi” Walker (Ellen Burstyn, Requiem for a Dream). In fact there is so much craziness in this movie, you think you are watching some Lifetime movie on television. So no there is nothing spiritual, mystical or inspirational to this movie.

The young Ya-Ya’s are having a séance under the moon in New Orleans about sixty plus years ago. They chant, wear freaky headdresses and give each other a silly name, then they cut themselves and share their blood. Okay, so this is a little different, but how can you have a sisterhood without some sort of pledge and ceremony. Cut to the present day and Time magazine is interviewing Siddalee about her latest writing success. This is where she discusses her unhappy childhood. Well her mother sees the article and war between Vivi and Siddalee breaks out. Her mother calls the Ya-Ya sisters Caro (Maggie Smith, Gosford Park), Teensy (Fionnula Flanagan, The Others), and Necie (Shirley Knight, Angel Eyes) over to rant about her ungrateful, lying daughter. This is also when a lot of booze flows, but one of the Ya-Ya’s is on a 12 step program (this is suppose to be funny). Siddalee’s father Shep (James Garner, Atlantis: The Lost Empire) just sits in the background acting like he is still amused by this loudness. Mother and daughter exchange phone calls, but only slam the phone on the table, yell and hang up. Siddalee’s finance Connor (Angus MacFadyen) is not amused, but tries to be sympathetic. Mother cuts daughter out of photographs and mails them, daughter cut mother out of wedding. Next thing you know the Ya-Ya’s minus Vivi are in New York using a Ruffie to kidnap Siddalee. Once back in New Orleans it is time for her to learn what her childhood was really about. This is where all the real secrets are revealed. You can’t really call them secrets, because everyone was there living it, only these secrets are open to interpretations from each party involved.

Well as I stated in the beginning, if you were looking for lighthearted entertainment with a funky theme and some Ya-Ya secret, well instead you get depression, alcoholism, child abuse and the whole she-bang. Not what I call quality entertainment. Yeah there are attempts at comedy with the old women still chanting at the moon, but it is just silly. Also appearing in this film are Caitlin Wach (Thirteen Days) as the young Vivi, Ashley Judd (High Crimes) as the young adult Vivi, David Lee Smith, Leslie Silva, Matthew Settle (Band of Brothers), Cherry Jones (The Perfect Storm) and director Callie Khouri. I didn’t have many expectations heading into this flick, and it didn’t disappoint. This film was not worth my time. If you are looking for this much dysfunction, watch a few hours of Lifetime, because I gave Ya-Ya a three on the About-Movies rating scale.

Last updated: Thursday, March 20, 2008 02:48:08 AM

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